This has been a good week, I guess. I am always thankful for countless things but these are the ones that dominate this week:
1) Silence... with a toddler, two dogs, a boyfriend, and the phone I often forget how nice silence can be. Lance and Alex went camping from Friday night until Sunday afternoon and I forgot how simple it is just to take care of yourself and to have no one to entertain. Now I went stir crazy without my boys but it was nice and I was so happy to get home. Only, when I got home, Alex was sleeping so I didn't get the welcome home I had hoped for.
2) Tylenol... Alex got some more shots today and has been running a pretty good fever since. It makes him happyish. It also does wonders for teething issues. Its awesome.
3) Laundry Baskets... They have multiple purposes: put Alex in, push him around and make him laugh; for Alex to push around and have fun with; to use to gather toys that are sprawled around the house; oh yea and for laundry!
4) Cuteness... Today at the doctor the nurse (whom I love and Alex loves) walked out and Alex ran up and hugged her and followed her. She is great and knows how to work with him. She has had to since he was an infant and sick infant at that. She walked in the room with his shots and he grabs his diper bag and clear as day tells her "No, I am going to see the Doctor" and walks to the door. Gotta love it!
5) Snuggles... they are good for mommy's and babys!
6) Most important: God, life, family, and friends.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Bad Moods
Its been one of those weeks I think. Where nothing goes how I want it and all I want to do is pout. Pouting, however, isn't helping. Then, I look at other people's lives and in all reality there is nothing for me to pout about compareatively. Friday morning I woke up with one of those "don't even look at me" attitudes where I wanted to do nothing, wanted to hear about nothing, and quite frankly cared about nothing. That is not a good thing for me, as many of you know. I decided I wanted to do nothing but cry too. Very unproductive. I still don't know what is wrong with me as I am on day three of my foul attitude. I think I need some serious church time as shopping and insane amounts of food didn't help.
Lance took Alex on his first camping trip Friday night. It is Lance's best friend's birthday weekend and all his friends seem to have birthday weekends not DAYS. I'm just saying. They went out to Navajo and had a blast while I stayed home with the dogs and worked. I am glad they had a great time, really. They even stayed an extra night and should be coming home today. As you can see above, he is clearly not missing his Mommy but I sure miss him. I am SOO lost without my boys I don't even know what to do with myself.
I felt somewhat productive last night. I have been looking for a dress to wear to Lance's dad's wedding for about two weeks now. His wedding is August 8. Now keep in mind, I wasn't procrastinating as I am known to do. I thought I was going to be away at training for work and was beyound bummed. I love Lance's family; most importantly his Grandma and I am counting the days until she gets here. I will never forget her face and genuine love she had for me from the first time I met her. It warms my heart and puts tears in my eyes still when I think back to Thanksgiving last year. That was probably one of the best trips of my life.
Friday, July 24, 2009
10 Things You May Not Know About Me
1) Lance and I met on a blind date. On my way to meet him I got pulled over and when the officer asked, I told him I am on my way for a blind date. He told me not to rush because they never last LOL!
2) We got Alex's name out of the cemetary before we even know what we were having. We never could agree on a girls name....
3) I love getting household items as gifts. As a matter of fact my favorite gift from Lance is my kitchenaid mixer.
4) I cry when I get angry or stressed. When I am sad I get quiet... A little opposite?
5) Lance is 6'5"; I am 5'0". Only a little hight difference.
6) At least once a month I contemplate the value of kicking and hurting and causing bodily harm to Lance. For example: NOW!
7) I, also, HATE shoes and socks. I still don't know why we need them.
8) I am trying to go to school for nursing, a two year degree is taking me at least 5 years at this point but I refuse to give up.
9) I don't work a Monday-Friday 8-5 and days like today I wonder why did I give that up?? But I love my job and Alex only has to go to daycare one day a week.
10) I never wanted to be a mommy, EVER. But now, obviously, I am and I LOVE IT
2) We got Alex's name out of the cemetary before we even know what we were having. We never could agree on a girls name....
3) I love getting household items as gifts. As a matter of fact my favorite gift from Lance is my kitchenaid mixer.
4) I cry when I get angry or stressed. When I am sad I get quiet... A little opposite?
5) Lance is 6'5"; I am 5'0". Only a little hight difference.
6) At least once a month I contemplate the value of kicking and hurting and causing bodily harm to Lance. For example: NOW!
7) I, also, HATE shoes and socks. I still don't know why we need them.
8) I am trying to go to school for nursing, a two year degree is taking me at least 5 years at this point but I refuse to give up.
9) I don't work a Monday-Friday 8-5 and days like today I wonder why did I give that up?? But I love my job and Alex only has to go to daycare one day a week.
10) I never wanted to be a mommy, EVER. But now, obviously, I am and I LOVE IT
Sunday, July 19, 2009
3 Years
On Thursday Lance and I celebrated three years together. Now, remember, we aren't married, but every year seems like a triumph. When I got pregnant with Alex we had only been together 8 months; it was a total shock to our systems but there were no questions or doubts as to what we would be doing in 9 months: raising our baby, together. Its been an amazing three years with hopefully many more to come.
These last three years have been a HUGE time of self discovery. I discovered what it is like to love, then what it is to love as a mom, and most importantly, what it is like to love and be in a relation ship with the lord. For that relationship all I can say is YAY!! Its amazing. I've learned that a person can be all accepting reguardless of the sitatuion, hormal moods, and everything else that gets in the way of day to day life.
For those of you who follow this: I am going back to school this fall. I am taking pre-nursing classes and getting ready to start nursing school, hopefully next fall. Lets keep our fingers crossed and pray that God provides. I am still mourning that I cannot go to church on Sunday
and I even thought about finding a church closer to home (we drive at least 30 minutes depending on traffic to go to church) but the only one I found has appeal but no Saturday night services so thats a no-go.
These last three years have been a HUGE time of self discovery. I discovered what it is like to love, then what it is to love as a mom, and most importantly, what it is like to love and be in a relation ship with the lord. For that relationship all I can say is YAY!! Its amazing. I've learned that a person can be all accepting reguardless of the sitatuion, hormal moods, and everything else that gets in the way of day to day life.
For those of you who follow this: I am going back to school this fall. I am taking pre-nursing classes and getting ready to start nursing school, hopefully next fall. Lets keep our fingers crossed and pray that God provides. I am still mourning that I cannot go to church on Sunday
and I even thought about finding a church closer to home (we drive at least 30 minutes depending on traffic to go to church) but the only one I found has appeal but no Saturday night services so thats a no-go.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Its been one of those.....
Days, weeks, moments ... regardless these last few days have been one of those. I guess I don't even know where to start and I just need to cry and scream and yell and act like my son does when he doesn't get his way. I guess I will start with him and a funny story to kick off this blog... I/We (mostly me) am trying to potty him and we went three days of perfect pottying (minus poop) and no accidents. So last night I put him in the bath and being the multi-tasking mom I have to be I was folding laundry at the same time watching him splash and play. Well he was in there and starting to prune when I went in to soap him up, and to my shock find floaters in the water. Yes, he pooped in the bath. YUCK. I was so grossed out I got him out and he finished his bath with a shower and a sit down on the potty which produced nothing. Well in my logic I figured he was done pottying. No. He walks into my bedrooms squats and pees on my floor. UGH so at this point i go to the other end of the house and grab a diaper and PJs assuming that he would have no more accident; however on my way back I find poo on my kitchen floor!!! UGH I just want to lose it at this point and I start laughing and get him dressed before he leaves me anymore "presents." It was total craziness.
So now ... let me start from the beginning. Its been a rough week, my birthday was Sunday and we are broke so I didn't get anything and I understand. I was still bummed and I have decided I was allowed to be, even if no one else agrees. Then I worked Tuesday night and got home at 630 and Alex decided he was going to get up early. So now I am running on little-to-no sleep with a toddler running around. He got to take out all his toys and not pick them up. Keep in mind, we were working on potty training which consisted of hourly (at least) trips to the bathroom. I was beat and grumpy and didn't want to do anything. Then I realized that I needed to make sure everything cleared the bank and i wasn't too badly over drawn. Well this most be a God blessing moment because I was over drawn, badly, but the house payment didn't get returned YAY.... But I had no money and the cell bill is due. So I, in my exhaustion, put it off until Thursday when Alltel chooses to inform me that I need over $500 (we are behind, long story including numerous fights with Alltel) to keep my service on because the last lady I talked to didn't put her notes on my account and thus the payment plan we worked out two weeks ago wasn't there and now I owed. Well after an hour of fighting, I told the lady I would see what I could do but not to plan on much because money doesn't grow on trees. I am not usually rude to people but when they can't do their jobs and screw me over I get rude and Lance says I use big words, so I probably did. So I went to verizon and switched phone services and have a new number for those who want/need it. Just let me know. The service isn't as good but my cell bill is $70 less a month so now I can pay off Alltel... joy.
Yesterday at work was slow but ok. I registered for school; they don't offer my major of Emergency Management and planning anymore so I changed back to nursing. Which I love but I have to figure out when I am done with my pre-req's how on earth am I going to take a year (well 10 months) off work for full time school and still pay the bills. But, for now, I am going to take this one day at a time and tackle my pre-reqs for the programs, get in and then plan from there. I feel this is what God really wants me to be doing with my life and I need to stay in the right path. Lance then calls me and tells me his mom is in the hospital; she was found passed out, breathing but unresponsive. Long story short on that: they admitted her last night and are doing tests on her heart. No one really knows what is going on and I don't know if they are asking some of the things I am to get answers that I understand with my medical background. So I will be patient and see what happens. I plan on going to see her after work tonight. Please pray.
On the last note for this never ending saga of the week.... Its a week where I have spent a lot of time looking into myself, my past, my relationships, being a mom, all of it. I am coming to terms with we live with the decisions we make, and we should live a no-regret life. If you search that term, tons of stuff comes up; many blogs for this mission to a no-regret life. Its easy to say and hard to live and when the past sometimes sneaks up on you whether it be through email, your own actions, dreams, God's message, whatever it may be; it needs to be faced. You can't get rid of friendships, memories, prayers, hopes, dreams, because there are challenges and road blocks in the way. This is true for nursing school for me.... I don't know that many of you know how hard I have been working and what I gave up when I graduated high school because I didn't have the money.... But sometimes I wonder...... I wouldn't change what I have now, don't get me wrong. I love my life for the most part, I love being a mom, I love it all. These challenges have bettered my relationships and helped me accept God and his path for me.
So now ... let me start from the beginning. Its been a rough week, my birthday was Sunday and we are broke so I didn't get anything and I understand. I was still bummed and I have decided I was allowed to be, even if no one else agrees. Then I worked Tuesday night and got home at 630 and Alex decided he was going to get up early. So now I am running on little-to-no sleep with a toddler running around. He got to take out all his toys and not pick them up. Keep in mind, we were working on potty training which consisted of hourly (at least) trips to the bathroom. I was beat and grumpy and didn't want to do anything. Then I realized that I needed to make sure everything cleared the bank and i wasn't too badly over drawn. Well this most be a God blessing moment because I was over drawn, badly, but the house payment didn't get returned YAY.... But I had no money and the cell bill is due. So I, in my exhaustion, put it off until Thursday when Alltel chooses to inform me that I need over $500 (we are behind, long story including numerous fights with Alltel) to keep my service on because the last lady I talked to didn't put her notes on my account and thus the payment plan we worked out two weeks ago wasn't there and now I owed. Well after an hour of fighting, I told the lady I would see what I could do but not to plan on much because money doesn't grow on trees. I am not usually rude to people but when they can't do their jobs and screw me over I get rude and Lance says I use big words, so I probably did. So I went to verizon and switched phone services and have a new number for those who want/need it. Just let me know. The service isn't as good but my cell bill is $70 less a month so now I can pay off Alltel... joy.
Yesterday at work was slow but ok. I registered for school; they don't offer my major of Emergency Management and planning anymore so I changed back to nursing. Which I love but I have to figure out when I am done with my pre-req's how on earth am I going to take a year (well 10 months) off work for full time school and still pay the bills. But, for now, I am going to take this one day at a time and tackle my pre-reqs for the programs, get in and then plan from there. I feel this is what God really wants me to be doing with my life and I need to stay in the right path. Lance then calls me and tells me his mom is in the hospital; she was found passed out, breathing but unresponsive. Long story short on that: they admitted her last night and are doing tests on her heart. No one really knows what is going on and I don't know if they are asking some of the things I am to get answers that I understand with my medical background. So I will be patient and see what happens. I plan on going to see her after work tonight. Please pray.
On the last note for this never ending saga of the week.... Its a week where I have spent a lot of time looking into myself, my past, my relationships, being a mom, all of it. I am coming to terms with we live with the decisions we make, and we should live a no-regret life. If you search that term, tons of stuff comes up; many blogs for this mission to a no-regret life. Its easy to say and hard to live and when the past sometimes sneaks up on you whether it be through email, your own actions, dreams, God's message, whatever it may be; it needs to be faced. You can't get rid of friendships, memories, prayers, hopes, dreams, because there are challenges and road blocks in the way. This is true for nursing school for me.... I don't know that many of you know how hard I have been working and what I gave up when I graduated high school because I didn't have the money.... But sometimes I wonder...... I wouldn't change what I have now, don't get me wrong. I love my life for the most part, I love being a mom, I love it all. These challenges have bettered my relationships and helped me accept God and his path for me.
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